ever feel like this?
Do you ever feel like the call on your life is too heavy to handle? Do you ever feel like turning your back on it and settling for LESS than God’s best for you? Well, to be honest with you, I have felt this way all too often recently. I guess in some aspect, that’s how we’re supposed to feel, because if we thought we could do it all on our own then we wouldn’t need Him. But gosh, it’s not always comfortable, or easy, walking the path that God has for you.
My Rabbi mentioned this week how many times when you feel like you’re going through a storm, it’s because you are drawing close to a time of new beginnings… and, for me, this couldn’t be more true. Sometimes it takes that extra “push” to get me moving, I have hang out in the valley for a little while before I remember to look UP. I love how God works though… It’s only through Him that I can be who I am destined to become. I need His pruning, love, and guidance in order to truly grow. It’s not enough to LOVE good and seek after it, but I have to hate the evil that wars against it… so much so that when I see it tugging at me I allow the Lord to cut it right off. Complete surrender, and nothing less is what is required of me…
Examining myself is a scary thing sometimes… It seems I have such a long way to go, so much to learn, so much that needs to change in my own heart… but I really believe that in order to change the world, and impact the lives of others, one must first be transformed themself. One of my favorite authors said it this way:
“We need to put less stock in what the world is doing and more in getting right with the Lord. It takes God to change a heart. A changed heart means a changed life. Enough of them and then, maybe God willing, the world will change.” (Francine Rivers)
So I guess all this to say that right now the Lord is walking me through a new season. One i’m SO excited about and scared of all at the same time. It’s not always comfortable, but the end result…. the outcome…. will have an eternal reward. Praise God for that!
Wow Sharon! I have been walking in this way for more than two years now. Painful. Ouch! Frustrating Yes! Aggravating Amen! Exciting? You bet! Wonderful? Sometmes. Over the last two years I have lost a job that I hoped to retire from after working there for more than 20 years, our worship director resigned after being involved in a relastionship with a woman not his wife and so I am not on the praise team now because I’m not sure where I fit anymore and then the small group Bible study that I had been a part of for three years disbanded. I feel as if I am back on the potter’s wheel and I rebel sometimes because I don’t want to be there. My call seems not heavy to me but impossible because I want to be released to do it now and it hasn’t happened. I am working two low paying jobs and going to school part-time and the only relieft in sight is that I will be able to retire in a few short months. I know right where you are and you have the right attitude God will reward you and use you. He will use even your uncertainty somewhere down the road to reach someone who will be in the same position and need what you have to say as someone whose walked there. It’s not eloquent but a favorite teacher of mine named T.D. Jakes says that you walk a whole lot different when you watch someone else go through stuff if you’re going through it too. We can be awfully prideful when everything is going well.Notice I said we. We all go there where we kind of feel like we’ve got it all figured out and then we find out that we really don’t sometimes we think we know it all but most times we really don’t know anything. God can use us the most I think when we feel like we don’t know anything because it’s like He is working from a blank page that He is free to write on.I look forward to hearing about all the wonderful and exciting things God is doing in your life.
Shalom,
Irene
amen.
“my grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.”
-2 Corinthians 12:9
i know there is a fine distinction between christianity and judaism, particularly in our belief or stand on who the messiah is, but i was reminded of this scripture as i read your post.
so regardless of our differences, we do still worship the same, one and only God. and thus i think we can agree that the scripture i cited is a divine truth or promise we can readily rely on, if we haven’t already.
thanks for sharing and God’s blessings,
rei